It starts with a glance, a compliment, a smile. Flirting over the water cooler leads to lunches, provocative e-mails and before long, you're in the middle of a hot romance. Or perhaps two of your employees are dancing with Cupid.

Before you turn a blind eye and ignore the lovebirds – or before you indulge in dating an employee or subordinate yourself - remember these three guidelines to stay out of trouble:

1. It's hard to enforce a no-dating policy – but a clearly written policy in an employee manual can shield you from future legal snafus.
2. Understand the difference between giving compliments and harassing someone.
3. Tread carefully, as sexual harassment complaints in small companies are on the rise

Action Steps
The best contacts and resources to help you get it done

Know what the law says about sexual harassment

Sexual harassment is not just about undesired glances, comments or advances. A court ruling in California, for example, allows employees to sue for sexual harassment if they can prove the boss had an affair with someone he or she promoted.

I recommend: Inform yourself and your employees with low-cost, plain-English training booklets on sexual harassment from Business & Legal Reports. These inexpensive answers could save your business a lot of time and trouble later on.

Write a clear policy on office romance

While you can't legislate love, you can spell out what's acceptable at your workplace and what isn't. Your corporate culture, industry and your supervisory judgment will determine if you need to develop a fraternization policy. If you do, publish it and show it to new employees as part of their orientation.

I recommend: American Management Association has a self-study course on writing policy manuals. NFIB has guidance for preparing a small business policy.

Employ common sense in office behavior

Iron-clad rule: Managers shouldn't get romantically involved with those they supervise. Others will see this as a conflict of interest, and ultimately, it can hurt the firm.

I recommend: WorkRelationships.com offers training, consulting and a seminar on appropriate workplace behavior.

Consider an Employee Assistance Program (EAP)

Most romantic office trysts end – and some end messily. Help your employees cope with confidential, free counseling through your company's EAP.

I recommend: Find an EAP professional at Employee Assistance Professionals Association.

Find out what others think about romance in the workplace

Office romance is high-risk, but few human resource professionals and employees think it should be banned.

I recommend: Read surveys to find what others think about the rewards and risks of romance at work. Vault Inc., a career information company, has thousands of surveys, including one on workplace romance in which 59 percent of managers said they would interfere only if work were compromised.

Tips & Tactics

Helpful advice for making the most of this Guide

• •  It's safer to date a peer in a different department rather than someone in your section.
• •  Break up on a Friday, never on a Monday.
• •  A spurned lover can file a claim of harassment – so be kind and respectful when ending the romance.
• •  Being in love can result in happier employees, and that usually means increased productivity and better health.