Writing Offer Letters... With Love

How to write offer letters that win the hearts of your job candidates.

By Betsy Harper, CEO & Managing Partner Sales and Marketing Search

I'm the "Dear Abby" of job seekers - at least for my friends and family. You see, because I'm in the business, they like to call me with questions about finding a new job, interviewing, writing resumes, working through the processes and everything in between. I don't mind. I'm all too willing to give you my opinion about anything at any time (which can be a blessing or a curse!)

So it wasn't unusual that a few weeks ago I was coaching my best friend (since fourth grade, no less!) Maureen, who is a talented special needs educator. She was going through the process of landing a pretty exciting new job in a new school district. Everything seemed to be on track. All meetings had gone very well and a verbal offer had been extended. She was thrilled.

I was really surprised when I got a call from her last week telling me that she had turned down the offer that she was on track to accept. It was when Maureen got the offer letter that severe disappointment set in. "I don't understand it," she told me. "It has no wording about what I will be doing, or the programs we had discussed or even my areas of responsibility. And, it was for the same pay I'm making now. I'm really disappointed. It's just flat." That lifeless letter was enough to deaden Maureen's enthusiasm for the job.

Don't Treat the Offer Letter as a Technicality!

While everyone involved, candidate and hiring manager, may seem "on board" with the fact that it's a "fait accompli," it's not. In the immortal words of Yogi Berra, "It ain't over till it's over." So make your offer letter compelling and be as involved in the crafting of the letter and the receipt of an affirmative as you are in every other step of the hiring process.

What Maureen got was what I call "The Offer Form Letter" and it can be just as she described it - flat! We all have one of those in our files. Here's my suggestion for what you should do with it - dump it! Well, dump most of it at least. I know there are parts of the letter that are necessary for HR reasons and I'm not suggesting you dump these, but keep what you need and then add the compelling offer "love letter" components.

Try:
Get loose (but not too loose...) by reading How to Write a Love Letter

Recap Your Interview/Reiterate Your Plan

Write some of the strategies and suggestions that were discussed during the interview process. (e.g., "We are excited that you will be growing our metro New York regional sales and look forward to helping you be successful in your sales career with us.")

Try: Interview Questions You CAN'T Ask

Tell Them You Want Them

While there are exceptions to every rule, never, ever pay someone (especially someone who you have been wooing and wowing!) the same amount of money as they are making now. I don't care if it's only $100 or $1000 more than they are currently making, your offer should be for more money. Why? There is an important psychological factor in earning even a little more money when you take a new job. And there's a real "disconnect" when a candidate has been wooed and wowed and then receives an offer letter for no more money than they are currently making. There's nothing that will dampen someone's enthusiasm for your company faster.

Try: Keeping Compensation Current and Competitive

Send Them a Present

I know of a company that includes a company tee shirt in their offer packet. I think it's a nice touch. If you've got those tees, squeeze balls or portfolios in the marketing department closet, get one out and send it. Instead of an offer letter envelope, they receive an offer box! It's an inexpensive way to earn lots and lots of good feelings.

Try: Make and Send a Company TShirt
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