Lead life or let life happen?
I personally think that our happiness lies between leading & being lead. Do you agree or disagree with below quote & why:
“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” – Lao Tzu.
NOTE: This is not an invitation to pitch, spam, sell services. Please don't reply trying to fix problems where nobody's asking for help. I post open questions for others to chime in and engage in authentic conversations. Please respect that.
Until a certain moment, I thought that I could not change anything. When I realized that I was at an unloved job, I was in a bad relationship, I had no hobbies, I took matters into my own hands. I started my own company, found a hobby (rock climbing), and use reference to date and build relationships. Now I am happy because I am in control of my life.
I am for the middle way. You need to do everything to make your life better, but remember that not everything depends on us.
Obviously lead life. If you just sit back and let life happen you will grow old regretting your docile decisions and say I wish I woulda, shoulda, coulda. Take the reins and "Conquer What You Chase" deal with the obstacles as they come.
The bird sings in the forest.
Does it seek to be admired for its song?
Let tears come when your heart tells you of its sadness.
Let joy come unasked, unplanned.
- Tao Te Ching
Life happens whether you lead it or not. You're always in a state of leading and being lead.
My belief is you can do either, but only one at a time, I liken it to planner and Journey man, I'm currently living the life of a journey man, a big difference from having my own businesses, for the last 30 years where life seemed to be 1 business plan after another, taking the journey man route has been a welcome change and has filled me with vigour and in site for my next business, whatever that is, or where ever it maybe!!!...life's not so bad!!!....but I miss business!!!
I love this Robert - I once heard a quote that life is a balance between knowing when to move and knowing when to let things proceed as they are. .....
I believe in both, but will admit that 'letting life happen' makes me feel guilty at times, as if I am taking God and the universe for granted. However, I cannot argue the many times I did let go...and what I needed most, came to me.
So... I believe it is a little of both. Plus, it feels awesome to give up trying to control everything!!
When I think about this I am reminded of the quote "You cant change the winds, but you can adjust the sails" (not sure who said it), so I think you lead life through whatever happens.
Your question really is what makes a happy life. As a 49 year old father of two daughtersand in my 25th year of my career, I found the answer is happiness lies in the struggle. I have always been most happy after having to deal with complex adversity. Coming out on the other side is an extremely rewarding feeling for me. It is why money does not make people happy, too often they lose sight of the fight. So I live my life leading life and following it. I think people should literaly follow their bliss but be prepared for the opportunitites that come along the way.
"But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads?"
- Albert Camus
My favorite happiness quote is Abe Lincoln's, "You are as happy as you choose to be."
Lao Tzu's writing places an emphasis on Wu Wei or "letting go". I am more comfortable with a Western statistical approach to dealing with the trials and tribulations that come our way. The book "Fooled by Randomness" can given a sense that in life "sh.. happens" and into"each day a little sunshine falls". We cannot control all the events we will encounter each day. There is a randomness to both the good and the bad that comes into our lives. That does not mean we sit back and await the next big break or disaster in our life. Work to be prepare for when the good or the bad appear. Appreciate the luck that we encounter along the way and remember that "there for the grace of God go I" when we see those less fortunate.
What is important is that you are the one that decides. You need to be in control or it will be done for you. Leading is a decision. However, choosing to be lead is also a decision. So is being spontaneous. You are the one that makes the choice. Do it for the right reasons.
Depends on the type of person you are... some people like to lead life some people like to let life happen, the important thing is to pick your spots.
Picking your spots is probably the most important aspect to entrepreneurship because EVERYBODY loves to talk, so sometimes you have to let go and other times you have to take charge.
I once heard a quote that life is a balance between knowing when to move and knowing when to let things proceed as they are.
And I think it is a balance. Too much of one or the other can land you in a bad place due either to too much driving or too many passive actions.
The middle path is the best, yet the hardest to walk. For many type A personalities letting things proceed is absolutely maddening. I know because I'm more on the let it roll side and my fiance is a go getter.
Its why we balance each other out and make a great team.
Absolutely true Marzena!
You indeed create your own future by what you decide to do now.
So if you decide to justify and argue for your own self-limits, you get more of them. That's how to get stuck. Ugh!
Alternatively, I empower my Get UNstuck NOW! VIP clients, in under 5 hours, with results guaranteed in writing. Once they wipe out all their previous self-limits and all negative emotional attachments, they will begin to consistently create a more compelling future. That's right,
When is now your time to achieve what you desire, Marzena? Decide to lead yourself to create only what serves you best.
Paul
This was going so well Paul, until you pitched me :). I'm not buying anything to be sold to. All I did was ask a question to start a conversation for all of us to chime in with authentic conversations not to sell services to each other and it's time the service industry understands the difference.
perfect answer - in my opinion